A mom of 2 boys

I have one boy with ADHD and other with Autism. They are highly functioning; I volunteer at their school since kindergarten and know they are in middle school.
Thanks to my ADHD boy the one with Autism is very verbal! He is out of speech.
My main problem is that both of them are using bad language and I know is not from me! I have tried to discipline but apparently I just have not been able to succeed. My older boy goes to therapy (adhd).It's not helping... and the other boy (with autism) repeats/ learns very quickly.
I do not think their disability is the excuse to express them self the way they do, but, I am very tired of taking responsibility of all they do/or say!
Just last week we went to a party and they were asked to leave since their vocabulary was so bad! What am I doing? Or what is it that I am not doing! Sometimes I wish I don't wake up! You will think this is nothing, but this is just the drop that made look for this site. I have no insurance! I take medication for depression and I see no light! I am strong, I do not know how to give up... but I am very tire.